Nude Food: Kumara Pizza and a Fizzy Bay-Breeze

Fasten your apron, taking a quick glance over your shoulder to make sure your buns are showing. Add a glass of red and some smooth mood music. I suggest an artist suitable to get your creative juices flowing—like, say, Tom Waits.

Right: now you are ready to make dough.

Take a bowl and put in about a cup of body temperature water. You don’t need to get too fussy, just put your finger under the tap and if it feels too hot it is, if it feels too cold it is, if it feels just right it is!

Now take yeast and sprinkle on top of the water so it floats (not shaken or stirred). Leave for about 10 to 15 minutes in a warm place in a large bowl.

Next with a spoon or paw, mix salt, granulated garlic half of the flour and your yeasty warm water. Mix well together adding a little flour at a time until you have a dough that should fall away from bowl as you dump it out. Use a flat and floured surface to knead it. Knead it like you knead a pizza or like you need another red wine!

Push down with your palms and fold it into itself until it is smooth and elastic. Now form the dough into a ball and place in a large lightly oiled bowl. Leave in a warm spot and cover with a damp cloth until the dough doubles in size.

Taking the dough punch down and knead it in the bowl for about two minutes. Then cut the dough in half and taking one piece at a time, in your hands, make a ball by folding up into it for about 30-40 seconds. Sit the dough in a pan and cover with plastic wrap. This creates a grain for the dough.

After about 30 minutes, take the dough from the bowl and place on floured bench and just press with your palms on top working in an outward circle. It should make a perfect round base, without the need for rolling. OK! Now you have your base you may as well crank up your oven to 200 degrees.

Next, combine your oil, rosemary, garlic and salt in a pan and sauté until you can smell the ingredients combine, then put aside. Do this before putting out bases.

Put kumara slices on a clean towel and sprinkle with sea-salt. Stand for 10 minutes to draw out any liquid then turn potatoes onto a clean, dry tea towel and pat dry. Take your bases and spoon or brush liberally with oil mixture.

Arrange kumara in a single, slightly overlapping layer on top then brush on remaining oil. Sprinkle sea-salt and cracked pepper and bacon bits and sprigs of rosemary. Bake for about 35 minutes or until potatoes are golden.

Take sour cream and mix with milk and put in squeeze bottle. Pour in a zigzag motion on top slice and serve with… in my humble opinion, something light and bubbly - A Fizzy Bay-Breeze.

Take a large pint glass, top with ice.

Pour in one part vodka, then equal parts cranberry and pineapple juice.

Fill glass to top with soda water.

Garnish with a twist of mint or lime.